


Indefinitely

by rinji_chan1



Series: Fanfic Exchanges [1]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: AU, Arashi Exchange 2018, Awkwardness, Drama & Romance, Falling In Love, First Dates, First Meetings, Flirting, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Notting Hill, Romance, Romantic Comedy, blowjob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:02:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23309587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinji_chan1/pseuds/rinji_chan1
Summary: [Originally posted on the Arashi Exchange 2018]An Arashi/Notting Hill AU. A bookshop owner named Nino meets Jun, who turns out to be a top idol and also a famous actor. Their friendly encounter eventually turns into a secret love affair.
Relationships: Aiba Masaki/Sakurai Sho, Matsumoto Jun/Ninomiya Kazunari
Series: Fanfic Exchanges [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1676314
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Yuuki_Nyanmaru](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yuuki_Nyanmaru/gifts).



Nino couldn't help but think that he has seen that guy before.  
  
Of course, he had seen many new faces of customers come and go in his bookstore. So he didn't bother to remember anyone's faces. But there was something about that guy that made him... _stand out_.  
  
Lowered cap. Dark shades. Coat that reached below his knees.  
  
He was like a hardbound book covered in plastic. With a note that said: Don't open and remove plastic.  
  
On the other hand, there was another suspicious customer he was focused on. The boy was wearing an oversized jacket with his hood on. He was often looking side to side.  
  
The guy in the coat then approched him, bringing a box set of the complete Harry Potter series.  
  
Nino had his eyebrows raised. "You a fan?" He asked.  
  
"I watched the first movie." The man remarked.  
  
"Huh." Nino smirked. "Pity. You have a lot of catching up to do."  
  
The man chuckled. "It's not like I had the time, you know."  
  
Nino blinked. The man seemed serious with his answer. "Okay... If you say so."  
  
As he was about to scan the barcode, at that very moment, Nino heard it. _**Click.**_  
  
The sound was so loud that the boy even caught the attention of the guy in the coat.  
  
The boy then ran towards the exit, however Nino reached him in time, grabbing his arm. "Where do you think you're going?" Nino said.  
  
The boy tried to pull his arm away, but Nino's grip was too tight. The boy then hung his head in embarrassment.  
  
"Give me your phone." Nino demanded.  
  
The boy quickly raised his head. "What?" He exclaimed. "No way!"  
  
"Rules are rules. Give me your phone!"  
  
The boy gave his phone to Nino, who snatches it and puts it in his pocket. He took the boy with him back to cashier. "Sit there and stay put." Nino ordered, pointing at the chair.  
  
"I'm so sorry for the wait, sir." Nino said as he turned to the man. "I had to take care of some things."  
  
The man shook his head. "No, it's alright."  
  
"That will be 7,745 yen."  
  
The man took his credit card out of his wallet. As Nino scanned the card, all of a sudden, the boy started talking. "Excuse me..." he said to the man. "I'm a big fan of yours."  
  
"Well, thank you." The man replied. "But, I suggest you be a good boy from now on." he said with a smile.  
  
Nino puts the box in a plastic bag and gave it to the man. "Thank you for your purchase!" Nino said as the man went out of the store. He then turned to the boy. "You know him?" he asked.  
  
The boy turned his face away from him, going back to his uncooperative self.  
  
"Fine, don't talk." He then went into his office where his friend and only employee was slacking off and sleeping at the computer desk. "Hey, Toma!"  
  
Toma lifted up his head and rubbed his eyes. "Yes?"  
  
"Watch the kid." Nino said. "I'm going to get some coffee at Ohno's."  
  
Ohno was a very close friend of Nino's, other than being a distant relative on his mother's side. He owned an american diner, Sammy's, which was right next to the bookstore.  
  
He goes inside and directly went into the kitchen, where he finds an irritated Ohno.  
  
"For the last time, we are not serving this!" Ohno shouted at one of the cooks. "Get a grip!" He threw a tray with badly burnt burgers into the trash bin. Ohno sighed.  
  
As he turned around and found Nino in front of him, Ohno's face immediately lit up. "Nino!" He went to him with open arms and tightly hugged him.  
  
"Woah..." Nino said and patted him on the back. "Is it that time of the month again?"  
  
"Knock it off." Ohno said and then let go. "So, what is it that you want this time?"  
  
"Oh, just the usual." Nino gave Ohno one hundred yen. "Keep the change."  
  
"2, 3 sachets?"  
  
"1, 3." Nino corrected. "2 sachets of sugar is too much, you know."  
  
Ohno went to prepare Nino's coffee. While he was waiting, Sho, another friend of his, walked into the kitchen. For some reason, he seemed to be in a daze, as if his soul had been sucked right out of him.  
  
"Hey, Sho." Nino tapped his shoulder.  
  
"Wah!" Sho screamed. "Nino?!" he said as he came to his senses. "What the heck, you scared me!"  
  
"Hey, what's wrong? Did something happen?"  
  
Sho sighed. "He's at it again."  
  
"Uh-huh..." Nino nodded. "Who's at it again?"  
  
Sho pointed over to the table at the very back. Nino looked at said direction and saw Aiba, a regular customer of Sammy's but only there to woo Sho. It seemed that the man had brought a bouquet of flowers.  
  
"Well, why don't you give the guy a chance?" Nino said.  
  
"What?" Sho exclaimed. "No way!"  
  
"Hey, hey..." Ohno butted in and gave Nino his coffee. "Why don't you just be glad? As for me, no one's ever done something like that for me." He told Sho.  
  
Sho rolled his eyes. "As if you could find guys like that in a bar."  
  
"Anyway, I gotta go." Nino said. "You're on your own now. See ya~"  
  
"Hey, wait a--"  
  
Nino closed the glass door and walked away. Seeing Sho stomp his foot made him giggle. As he turned his head towards his direction, he accidentally bumped into someone.  
  
"Hey!" the guy exclaimed. Nino recognized the voice. It was the flashy-looking guy from earlier. Nino's coffee, now wasted, had stained the man's coat and sweater.  
  
"Oh gosh, I- I am so sorry." That was all Nino could say at the moment.  
  
"Geez! Watch where you're going!" The man then clicked his tongue. "Damnit, I can't go to work like this..." he said as he looked at his stained clothes.  
  
"I'm really sorry," Nino said and started to panic. "Okay, I'll make it up to you. My house is just a few blocks away from here. We could get it cleaned there, if you want."  
  
The man sighed. "Fine, I'll go with you." he said. "While I still have time."

  
  
"Make yourself at home." Nino said as they walked inside his home.  
  
Immediately, Nino started the washing machine. "This might take awhile. But, I'll try to make it fast as soon as..." Nino abruptly stopped. He found the man had stripped off his coat and sweater, leaving him only wearing a black tank top.  
  
It was only then, without the cap and the shades, that Nino was able to see the man's face clearly. His hair was medium-length and quite wavy. And his eyes. Right then, all that Nino could see were his eyes. He hasn't seen eyelashes as pretty and long as this man's.  
  
Nino gulped. "...possible."  
  
"Here." The man handed his clothes to him.  
  
"Ah, yeah..." Nino took them. "It won't take long, I promise."  
  
"Whatever you say."  
  
Nino puts the clothes into the washing machine and went back to the living room. He found the man sniffing his own tank top with his abs showing.  
  
The man looked at him as he realized his presence. "What?"  
  
Nino immediately averted his eyes. "You know..." he said. "No one's going to be able to smell that anyway." He glanced back at the man, only to find him smirking.  
  
"Relax." the man said. "Just making sure." He then let go of his tank top. Nino quietly sighed with relief.  
  
"Nice house." The man then changed the subject as he casually sat down on the sofa.  
  
"Uh, thank you. Same reason why I bought it."  
  
The man leans back on the sofa and sighs. "I wish I had my own house."  
  
Their conversation didn't seem to go anywhere, to the point that the room once again was dead silent. Even so, Nino just couldn't stop staring at him. It's been a while since he had had another man, other than his friends, in his house. And if anyone, especially Ohno, found out about this, he'd be a goner.  
  
The shape of his profile and his defined jawline. His exposed neck and collarbones. And his well-toned arms. If Nino were at a bar, he would be head over heels and go talk to him straight away. But it wasn't the time to flirt at all.  
  
Suddenly, the man turned his head towards Nino, who quickly averted his eyes. "You don't know me, do you?" the man asked.  
  
Nino shook his head. "No, I don't."  
  
The man arched his brow. "Really?"  
  
"Just what do you mean by that anyway?"  
  
"Don't you, like, follow any celebrities? Idol groups?"  
  
"Really, I don't. I just came back to Tokyo a few years ago." Nino remarked. "And I don't really watch TV that much anymore."  
  
"Pity. You have a lot of catching up to do too," the man said, mimicking Nino's words from earlier at the bookstore. Nino responded by rolling his eyes.  
  
"Well, I'll just have to introduce myself to you then." The man then stood up and walked towards Nino. "I'm Matsumoto Jun," he said and extended his hand.  
  
Nino then held and shook his hand. "Ninomiya Kazunari. Or Nino. So, are you from around here?"  
  
"No. I came here by car; just passing by and looking around the shops..." Jun stops and his eyes became fixated on the poster pasted onto the wall. He went nearer to take a closer look. "I see you also like paintings?" He said.  
  
"Oh, that's from my distant cousin, Satoshi," Nino said. "I was really attracted to it."  
Jun read the katakana writing on the poster. " _Ra Marii_."  
  
"Yeah, _La Mariée_." Nino corrected him. "It means 'The Bride' in French."  
  
Jun tilted his head and sighed. "Paintings are sometimes really hard to understand."  
  
"Well, that's true." Nino went to stand beside Jun. "But it's no different from trying to understand people, don't you think?"  
  
Jun chuckled. "Are you saying this from experience?"  
  
He sighed. "Maybe. It's been a long time."  
  
"So, you're saying you're single?"  
  
"Yes," Nino said. "I've been to a couple of blind dates. But nothing clicked."  
  
"At least you get to have blind dates."  
  
"Nah, it was my cousin's idea; it's not my thing. And I don't intend to be in a relationship right now."  
  
"Understandable," Jun said. "But have you taken any interest in anyone yet?"  
  
Nino turned to him. Jun was totally looking at him intently. "No. No one," Nino said.  
  
The washing machine's alarm sounded from across the room. Nino went to turn it off and proceeded to take Jun's clothes out of it.  
  
As soon as the clothes turned had dried, Jun wore them again. "Thank you very much for your help," Jun said when he was ready to go.  
  
"No problem," Nino said.  
  
Their eyes were fixated on each other. It was the only thing filling up the silence. There was something about the way Jun looked at him. But Nino couldn't figure out what.  
  
"Well, it was nice meeting you," Jun said.  
  
"You too."  
  
Jun puts his shades on. "Bye." He said as he stepped out.  
  
"Goodbye."  
  
Nino closed the door shut and sighed. However, as he was about to turn away, the doorbell suddenly rang. He quickly opened the door, only to find Jun again at his doorstep.  
  
"I forgot my hat," Jun said.  
  
"Oh."  
  
Jun entered the house again to retrieve the hat from the living room. "Thanks again." he said as he puts it on.  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
With his shades on, it was even harder for Nino to tell what was on Jun's mind.  
  
Before he knew it, Jun moved closer and leaned in for a kiss. His lips were so soft and so tender. Nino closed his eyes, savoring the moment.  
  
As the kiss ended, Nino flicked his eyes back open and saw Jun briefly smiling at him. And just like that, Jun walked out and closed the door.  
  
Nino felt lost, trying to process what had just happened. He was staring blankly at the wallpaper of his house. Suddenly, he heard his phone ringing.  
  
No. The boy's phone, he realized.  
  
"Hello?" he said as he answered the call. "My name's Ninomiya Kazunari. Yes, well, about your son..."  
  
***  
  
Nino was looking at some magazines at the convenience store. Actually, he was looking at one particular magazine. He was having goosebumps all over.  
  
The same hair, the same eyes, the same lips. It was no mistake.  
  
Matsumoto Jun was on the cover of a magazine.  
  
Few days had already passed since he first met Jun, but Nino remembered it like it had been yesterday. That wasn't good. He was already touching his lips unconsciously.  
  
Not a great way to start the day.  
  
Back in the bookstore, the new book arrivals had just come in. And he had to arrange the whole bookshelf. The struggling Nino carried the boxes one by one. It was only 8 in the morning and he's already exhausted. His day was getting worse and worse.  
  
He then hears the telephone ringing at the counter.  
  
"I'll get it." Toma rushed to the counter and answered the phone. "Hello, welcome to Ninokuniya bookstore. This is Ikuta speaking... Hey, boss!" he called out to Nino.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Some guy just called and wants to talk to you."  
  
Nino groaned. "Not now! I'm busy."  
  
"He says he's Matsumoto Jun's manager."  
  
Nino stopped dead in his tracks. "His what?"  
  
"Should I tell him to call later?"  
  
Nino went to the counter, grabbing the telephone. "Give me that." he said. "Hello? Yes, this is Ninomiya Kazunari. Yes, I have time. Why?" Nino's eyes widened. "Okay... Where?" He then slowly nodded. "Alright. I'll be there." The called then ended and Nino put down the phone.  
  
"What did he say?"  
  
Nino put his hand on his head. "He wants me to meet up with him."  
  
"The manager?"  
  
"Not the manager, you idiot." Nino glared at him.  
  
"Actually, now that I think about it, the name kinda rings a bell."  
  
He then sighed. "I have to go. Arrange the books for me, and..." He then pointed directly at Toma. "Don't you dare remove the plastic covers." He warned him. "Especially the manga."  
  
"I shall control my urges." Toma saluted as Nino walked out of the store.  
  
"Watch the store for me!" Nino shouted on his way out.  
  
The said meeting place was just a train station away from his home. He had dressed up before going there, wearing a long sleeved shirt and dress pants. He then waited. A man in a suit approached him.  
  
"Hello. Are you Mr. Ninomiya?" the man asked.  
  
"Yes. That's me."  
  
"Pleasure to meet you. I'm Matsumoto's manager, Tosaki. Please follow me."  
  
Nino did as he was told; he followed the man and entered through the back side of a building. They then entered a room, and the first thing that Nino saw is Jun surrounded by his make-up artists and hairstylist. He didn't recognize him at first.  
  
"Mr. Matsumoto," Tosaki called him.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Mr. Ninomiya is here."  
  
Jun turned his head towards them. As he made eye contact with Nino, a smile appeared on his face.  
  
Nino hated to admit it, but for a while there, it was like his heart had skipped a beat.  
"Have a seat," Jun said. "I'm just having a retouch."  
  
Nino sat down on one of the chairs and waited.  
  
"It's done!" One of the make-up artists said. Jun stood up from his seat and gestured to Tosaki, to which Tosaki replied with a nod. They all then went out of the room. And as the door closed shut, Nino's heart beats loudly.  
  
It was only the two of them now.  
  
"You actually came." Jun tried to break the ice.  
  
"I never thought that I would see you again."  
  
"Were you surprised?"  
  
Nino tilted his head. "Somehow."  
  
The idol briefly smirked at him.  
  
"Uh, I saw this month's magazine earlier." Nino changed the subject. "It was very nice."  
  
"Oh, thanks." Another dead end to their conversation.  
  
Nino started to wonder, why exactly had Jun called him in? But before he could ask, Jun spoke suddenly.  
  
"I'm sorry, about last time..." he said. "I don't know what came over me. So, please forget about it. It's become a habit for me lately."  
  
"A habit?"  
  
"Yeah... I kiss a lot of people at work, you know. Women, men; actors and comedians. It happens all the time."  
  
"So, you called me to come here just to apologize for kissing me?" Nino raised his brow.  
  
"Yes." He nodded. "Well, I just thought you might have been bothered by it."  
  
"Well, not really," Nino remarked. "I mean, the last time I got kissed by a guy was... 2 years ago."  
  
Jun furrowed his brow.  
  
"Long story."  
  
It was only then that Jun gave a nod. "I see." he said and chuckled awkwardly. "How interesting."  
  
The door then opens and Tosaki's head peered out. "Matsumoto." Tosaki said. "It's your turn on the set."  
  
"Alright." Jun started to leave, then stopped and turned to Nino. "Wanna come and watch?"  
  
"Uh, no, I'm fine..."   
  
"Come on." Jun pulled him and dragged him along.  
  
They went outside the building to a nearby park. Cameras, lights, and other sorts of equipment were all around the place. It was the first time Nino had seen a film shooting in real life.  
  
"Just stay here," Jun told him and went with the other actors.  
  
Nino watched them as they all went to their places, getting ready. Some of the staff members went to Jun to fix his hair again due to the wind.  
  
"Hey, you there!" Nino heard someone shout and looked in the person's direction. The man was sitting on a chair and wearing shades and a cap. Nino guessed that he was the director.  
  
"You!" The director shouted and pointed at Nino. "Why are you standing there?"  
  
Nino looked around, checking if there was someone else. "Me?" He then pointed at himself.  
  
The director facepalmed. "Yes, you!" He stood up and took Nino to what seemed to be a couple of extras. "Remember the drill, people!" The director walked away and went back to his seat.  
  
"No, wait, I'm not..."  
  
"And action!"  
  
The extras immediately started walking into different directions and Nino went along with them. He happened to pass by Jun and shot him a quick glance. He was in character and was talking to his co-star. His stance, gaze, and everything; Jun really was a superstar.  
  
"And cut!" The director said. "Alright! Let's go on with the next scene!"  
  
Nino sighed with relief. It was finally over.  
  
"Hey, not bad for a beginner!" Jun appeared and wrapped his arm around Nino.  
  
Nino glared at him. Jun took his arm off of Nino's shoulders.  
  
"Sorry. I didn't expect they'd think you were an extra," he apologized. "Besides, you looked great really!"  
  
"Not as great as you."  
  
Jun shook his head. "No, I'm not great."  
  
"Well, you're the star."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
The two started to walk around, side by side. "Anyway, so, how are you?" Jun asked. "And how's your store?"  
  
"I'm good." Nino replied. "The store's fine. Just needs reorganizing."  
  
"You don't get a lot of customers, do you?"  
  
"On weekdays, yes. But, most of them usually come at the weekends." Nino remarked. "And you?"  
  
"I have a commercial shooting later tonight. And there's also a music video shooting right after that."  
  
"Yikes."  
  
"Yeah, I know." Jun chuckled. "Like I said before, it's not like I have time to do other things."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"You know, like going out for dinner or going to the movies; meeting friends, or having dates..." Jun stopped walking. Nino too came to a halt and turned to Jun.  
  
"What?" Nino said.  
  
"I have something to tell you."  
  
Nino held his breath as he waited for Jun to speak.  
  
"I lied." the idol said.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"I didn't ask for to come here only to apologize." he explained. "I just wanted to see you, Nino."  
  
Nino nodded. "I see. For some reason, I'm not surprised."  
  
Jun raised his head.  
  
"I, too, have been wanting to see you. And here I am."  
  
Jun stared at him, wide-eyed.  
  
Gradually, Nino felt that his cheeks got warmer. "Well, this is embarrassing." he said and laughed.  
  
Jun laughed along. "Yeah. So, do you want to go out for dinner sometime?"  
  
"Yeah, sure." Nino said. "I don't see why not. Shall we exchange numbers then?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
Both of them took out their phones and did so. "Should we try texting each other?" Jun said.  
  
"Right now?"  
  
"Yeah. I'll go first."  
  
Jun began to type. He seemed to be taking his time and writing something very, very long. Despite wanting to take a peak, Nino waited paitiently.  
  
And then, finally, Nino's phone buzzed. The text wasn't long as he expected. But, it was enough.  
  
 _I like you._  
  
Nino then typed:  
  
 _I know. I like you too._  
  
Jun's phone buzzed and Nino watched him read the text. Jun looked up at him and slowly a smile formed on his face.  
  
After the shoot, Nino and Jun took the van to go back to the bookstore. Tosaki, the driver of the van, kept glancing at them through the rear view mirror. "Seems quiet back there," Tosaki said.  
  
"Yeah." Nino had kind of gotten used to how quiet they were. He and Jun looked at each other and laughed.  
  
As soon as they arrived at their destination, Nino stepped out of the van. "So, see you around?" he said.  
  
"Yeah, see you." Jun slide the door close and the van drove away. Nino watched the van until it was out of sight.  
  
"Ahem."  
  
Nino turned around and found Ohno with his arms crossed. _Crap._  
  
"Oh, hey, I didn't see you there!" Nino said, forcing a smile. "Is that a new tie? It really suits you. I mean, where could I get one of those? Seriously." he laughed.  
  
The older man raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Fine," Ohno said. "I'm letting you go this time."  
  
***  
  
Since then, Nino and Jun would text each other and talk about... almost anything. Paintings, books, what they were having for dinner. Actually, there was not a day when they didn't text each other, with some late night conversations. Even during breaks when he would go to Sammy's, Nino would be glued to his phone, smiling to himself.  
  
"Looks like someone's in love," Sho crept up behind Nino.  
  
"Whatever," Nino said, still looking at his phone, waiting for Jun's reply.  
  
"I suggest you don't wait too long for a reply." Aiba suddenly joined in on their conversation. "And speaking of replies, you haven't replied to my messages, Sho!"  
  
"You think anyone would be awake at 2 in the morning to answer a question like 'Do you like dogs'?" Sho said.  
  
"What? There's nothing wrong with asking that."  
  
Ohno came and handed Nino his drink. "Let me guess. Is it that idol again?" he said.  
  
"Yup." Nino replied.  
  
"Seriously, you look like an idiot with that silly smile on your face."  
  
"I don't mind."  
  
Ohno sighed. "Well, I just hope you're not going to make the same mistakes like you did last time."  
  
"Hey, Jun's different, alright? Don't get so worried about it."  
  
"As long as you don't come to me crying again."  
  
Nino chuckled. "Of course not."  
  
"I hope so."  
  
Nino walked back into the bookstore. Toma was refilling the cash register with coins and bills. "Hey, boss, this came in just earlier." Toma said and gave the package to Nino.  
Nino opened the box. Inside it was what looked like a CD and on the cover were Jun and the other members of his group called Arashi.  
  
"Did you order it?" Toma asked.  
  
"No." Nino said. "It's a gift."  
  
"That's weird. You're not even into boy groups, or rather, any idol group at all."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
Inside the case, at the back of the booklet, was Jun's signature followed by a heart. Nino was pleased to the point that he played the song in the bookshop later that day.  
  
He even watched it on Music Station. He used to change the channel whenever it was on. But now, he was going to watch from start to finish because Jun was there.  
  
During the whole performance, Nino couldn't stop grinning. Especially when the camera showed a close-up of Jun, who looked and pointed towards it and winked.  
  
Suddenly he heard his phone ringing. He looked to check who was calling and saw a single letter: J.  
  
Nino quickly grabbed hold of his phone. "Hello?" Nino said as he answered the call.  
  
"Hello," Jun said.  
  
"What made you call so suddenly?"  
  
"I reserved a table at a restaurant. Are you free tomorrow night?"  
  
"Yeah. Definitely." Nino said, without any second thought. "What time?"  
  
"Nine."  
  
"Alright. See you."  
  
"See you."  
  
Nino put his phone down. He couldn't contain his excitement so he actually raised his arms and shouted: "Yes!" They were going to have a dinner date.  
  
Finally, the next night came. Jun sent to him the address of the Japanese restaurant earlier that morning. Nino pushed the door open and immediately one of the waitresses came to him. "Welcome," she said.  
  
"Um, I'm looking for Matsumoto?" Nino said.  
  
The waitress led him into one of the rooms. Inside, Jun was sitting at table. He was still wearing a beanie and shades. "Hi." he said.  
  
"Hi." Nino went in and sat down opposite him. "It's been a while." He said as soon as the waitress had left.  
  
"Has it?"  
  
"Well, texting each other and all. But, yeah, it's only now that we've met again actually."  
  
All of a sudden, some waitresses came in and brought large bentos. There was also sushi which was neatly lined up and some skewers. "Enjoy your meal," they said and left.  
  
"Woah," Nino exclaimed. "This is... too much. You ordered all of this?"  
  
Jun nodded.  
  
"How much exactly is this?"  
  
Jun shook his head. "No need."  
  
"No, no! This is too much. I can't let you..."  
  
"No, really, you can," Jun said. "I already paid for it earlier."  
  
Nino felt guilty. If only he could give as much in return what Jun gave him.  
  
"Go on. Eat up," Jun said.  
  
Having no choice, Nino took his chopsticks and said his thanks for the meal. He took some sushi and dipped it in soy sauce. He took the whole thing into his mouth. "It's good." he said with his mouth full.  
  
Jun smiled tenderly at him. Nino then ate another sushi. But it was hard to chew and swallow when Jun quietly stared at him.  
  
"Aren't you going to eat?" Nino asked.  
  
"I'm fine." he said. "I'm not that hungry yet."  
  
"Come on." Nino took a sushi with his bare hands and dipped it in soy sauce. He extended his arm to reach Jun's mouth. As Jun finally took a bite, Nino let it go.  
  
He found some sauce left on Jun's lips. "Let me wipe it off for you." Nino said and stood up from his seat and went to sit next to Jun. He took a napkin and gently wiped the sauce off. "There," Nino said as he was done.  
  
Their faces were very close to each other. Nino found Jun's eyes fixated on his lips. He was about to lean in, wanting to kiss the idol, but was taken aback when he suddenly heard loud laughter and chatter from next door.  
  
Jun chuckled as he saw Nino starting to blush. Nino turned away in embarrassment.  
  
"Idols these days..." They heard a voice from the other side. "Especially those damn Johnny's."  
  
"My daughter is fan of... what's his name? He's from that group, Arashi."  
  
The two then looked at each other, with Jun raising his eyebrows.  
  
"Ah, I remember; Matsumoto Jun."  
  
Jun smiled as he heard his name.  
  
"You mean the one who can't act?" They roared with laughter.  
  
Jun rolled his eyes. Nino laughed.  
  
"Seriously, she keeps buying stuff and going to their concerts." They heard him click his tongue. "It's such a pain in the ass."  
  
"Yeah." One agreed. "In the end, they're just in it for the money like everyone else."  
  
Jun's smile slowly disappeared.  
  
"Yeah, what's so good about that Matsumoto Jun anyway?" the man exclaimed. "Heck, I have a better voice than him, even when I'm drunk."  
  
"I heard he got in without an audition." one of them said.  
  
"Maybe his family paid the agency."  
  
"Or maybe... that dirty old man Johnny wanted him," they snickered.  
  
Jun looked down on his knees. Seeing this, Nino clenched his fists. He could feel the blood rushing in his veins. "That's it," he said.  
  
"Nino, I'm fine. Please don't do this," Jun pleaded.  
  
Nino brushed off his hand and stood up. "They've gone too far."  
  
"Nino..."  
  
Nino stomped out and barged into the other room.  
  
"Ahem," Nino cleared his throat. "Excuse me." They all turned their attention to him. "Sorry to interrupt, but my friend and I were having a discussion and your voices are very distracting, so could you please keep it down? Also, can't you at least have a little respect when talking about someone?"  
  
One of the men laughed. "What's it to you?" he said. "This is our table; we can talk about whatever we want!"  
  
"Yeah, mind your own business!" another one jeered. "We're all customers here!"  
  
Nino wrinkled his face as they all mocked him. Jun held his arm and took him away. "Just ignore them," Jun told him.  
  
They were about to leave but one of the men yelled: "Man, what a sissy!"  
  
Jun stopped dead and let go of Nino's arm. "You know what?" he said. "I changed my mind."  
  
The idol then turned around and went back to the group's table. He sat down, taking off his hat, revealing his long hair. "Hey there." he said.  
  
The businessmen suddenly stopped laughing as they turned towards him. Their mouths were wide open.  
  
"I see you guys are having fun, huh? May I have a sip?" Jun grabbed the bottle of sake and drank what was left of it all at once.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry." he said and chuckled. "I got a bit carried away. Anyway, I just want to apologize for my friend. He's quite sensitive, I know."  
  
One of the businessmen stood up and started to apologize. "Oh no, w-we're so sorry..."  
  
"No, it's alright! I understand; you all must be stressed out from work and life. No wonder even your wives are getting sick of you and falling for us. Enjoy your night," Jun stood up and strode out of the restaurant, followed by Nino.  
  
As they went out, Jun almost tripped by missing a step on the stairs on their way down.  
  
"Are you okay?" Nino asked. "You're not drunk, are you?"  
  
"No." Jun said, grabbing the railings. "Just a bit tipsy I think. Maybe that's why they had those cute, tiny cups."  
  
"Want me to walk you home?"  
  
Jun nodded. "Yeah, I'd love that."  
  
They walked to Jun's apartment. Nino locked arms with Jun to assist him.  
  
"Hey, Nino," Jun said. "When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grow up?"  
  
"Well, I wasn't really sure," Nino said. "My mother wanted me to be an idol, but it wasn't my thing. But, I love books; it was the only thing I was sure of."  
  
Jun smiled at him. "Well, lucky you."  
  
"Not really."  
  
"As for me, I didn't know what I wanted to be." Jun said. "I got into something I didn't even sign up for. They all made the decisions; they didn't even ask for my opinion."  
  
"Do you... hate your job?"  
  
Jun turned his head towards Nino with widened eyes. "No, of course not." he said quite firmly. "When Arashi was still at the bottom, all we could think about was to make our fans happy. It was the only thing that mattered. Each opportunity we got; it was make it or break it."  
  
"Many people supported us throughout the years," Jun continued. "We didn't want to let them down; we didn't want to let anyone's efforts go to waste. Doing what I do, being an idol, was the only way to return the favor."  
  
Nino couldn't do anything but nod in response.  
  
The two went into Jun's apartment. Nino removed his shoes and put them on the shoe rack. He could feel the fur floor brushing his feet as he walked. Some of the idol's clothes were scattered around the place. There were also paintings hanging all around.  
  
"Hey, give me your hand," Jun said and gestured him to come over.  
  
Nino approached him and extended his hand. Jun puts an object into his hand. "Here," he said.

Nino looked at what he had received. It was a key. "What's this for?"  
  
"A key to my house." Jun suddenly started to giggle.  
  
"Oh no, Jun. I can't have your spare key."  
  
"No, it's for you." he said. "I had it made yesterday."  
  
"Well, I appreciate that."  
  
"That way, you can come to my house anytime you like." Jun moved forward and leaned towards Nino.  
  
"Uh yeah." he said as Jun wrapped his arms around him. "That's great."  
  
Jun's gaze was stuck at him. Nino pretty sure knew were this would lead. After all, they were just next to Jun's bed. And Jun was drunk.  
  
Suddenly, Jun cupped Nino's face with his hands. The idol's eyes were totally focused on his lips. And finally, they were kissing.  
  
Jun's kiss was kind of sloppy; his tongue was aimlessly roaming around inside his mouth. Nino could taste the sake that Jun had drunk earlier. He puts his hand on Jun's neck, pulling him in, and deepened the kiss.  
  
Nino then released Jun from his grip. Both of them were breathless and gasping for air. Jun bended down and started coughing.  
  
Nino wiped the sweat from his forehead. "I think that's enough." he said.  
  
Jun sat down on his bed and licked his lips. "Yeah."  
  
Nino walked to the door. "Good night, Jun," he said.  
  
"Good night."  
  
Nino then closed the door and locked it with the key Jun had given him. He put his hand over his face, slid it down to his chin, and sighed. He had almost been close to getting carried away.  
  
He then looked at the key in his hand and shook his head. As much as he wanted to use it, he didn't want to dare himself. He sighed and put the key into his pocket.  
  
***  
  
Nino was busy refilling the cash register when suddenly someone slammed what appeared to be a tabloid newspaper onto the counter. Nino looked up only to find Ohno glaring at him.  
  
"What did you do that for?" Nino said.  
  
"Take a good look at the front page headline."  
  
Nino turned over the newspaper and read the headline. His eyes widened. It read: **Matsumoto Jun and co-star spotted!!** along with secret shots of Jun holding hands with the actress as they left of the restaurant.  
  
"And?"  
  
"I just thought that you should know about it."  
  
"Seriously, you really believe in such gossip?" Nino scoffed.  
  
"Look who's talking. Think about it, Nino. Can you really trust him?"  
  
"I think the one who has a problem with trust is you," Nino shouted. "If you have nothing else to say then get out."  
  
Ohno squinted his eyes. "Fine," he said. "Don't make me say I told you so." He walked out of the shop. Nino rolled up the newspaper and shoved it into the trash bin.  
  
He tried to go back to work, but he couldn't get the article out of his mind. He thought about a lot of questions: _Who? Where? When? Why?_ And _what if?_ He ended up thinking about it all day until he went home afterwards.  
  
He didn't even bother to turn on the TV. Because at that time, VS Arashi would be airing. He wasn't in the mood to see Jun's face. Or even hear his laugh. He probably should just sleep and forget all about it. But before he could, the doorbell had rang. Nino groaned and stood up.  
  
As he opened the door, Jun, of all people, went straight inside and slammed the door shut. He was panting and sweating all over. "Sorry for the sudden visit, but I needed to hide somewhere," Jun said.  
  
"Are you alright?" Nino asked.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine," Jun then sighs. "The paparazzi are following me." The idol fell on his feet and sat down on the floor. "You don't mind if I spend the night here, right?" he asked.  
  
"Not at all."  
  
Jun started to untie his shoelaces. "You seem so quiet today," the idol remarked.  
  
"I'm not," Nino said.  
  
"But you are."  
  
Nino sighed. "I read the article." he then admitted.  
  
Jun stopped suddenly what he was doing and looked up at Nino. "And?"  
  
"Who was she?"  
  
Jun averted his eyes, looking down on the floor. He then sighed. "She's just a friend," he said. "We finished taping the drama, so the cast decided to celebrate," Jun continued untying his shoelace.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be. It's alright. I've also done that before."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Four years ago, our leader had a really big scandal. The other members and I didn't dare to talk about it but..." Jun stopped and shook his head. "Well, life goes on." He put his shoes on the shoe rack.  
  
"Well, what was her reaction about it then?"  
  
"She cut me off. And it's understandable why."  
  
"But, you're okay, right?"  
  
Jun looked down and bit his lip. His eyes looked a bit watery. Nino went to him and put his hand on his shoulder. Jun turned towards him and hugged him. They stayed like that until they heard the doorbell ringing, causing Nino to separate from Jun.  
  
Nino opened the door and found Toma in front of his door. "Toma?" Nino exclaimed.  
  
"Evening, boss," Toma greeted. "Oh, hey," he said as he saw Jun behind Nino. "I've seen you before somewhere..."  
  
"I think everyone has." Jun said. "I'm Matsumoto Jun."  
  
"Hello," Toma grinned and waved his hand. "Hope I didn't interrupt anything."  
  
"Well, not really." the idol briefly smiled.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Nino asked.  
  
"I need to ask you for a favor," Toma handed Nino the box he was holding. Nino looked inside and found adult magazines and DVDs.  
  
"My mom's going to stay at my house a couple of days," Toma explained. "She's totally gonna kill me if she sees these."  
  
Nino looked up at him with a glare. "What are you? A kid?"  
  
"Come on, just give me a week. Please!" Toma cried.  
  
Nino sighed. "Alright, alright."  
  
"Phew. Thanks, man," Toma gave him a thumbs up. "If you want, you can even use them in the mean time. For reference."  
  
Jun tried to hold back his laughter which caused his cheeks to puff up.  
  
Nino groaned. "Just get going already, Toma."  
  
"Alright, alright." Toma laughed. "Don't get so worked up." He then turned to Jun. "It was nice meeting you." he said and bowed his head.  
  
"You too," Jun replied.  
  
Once Toma had closed the door, the room was silent again. Nino clicked his tongue as he put down the box on the dining table. "That idiot," he muttered. "Coming here at this hour."

Jun too had taken a peak inside and started rummaging the contents of the box. "Ah." Jun's jaw dropped.  
  
"What?"  
  
Jun took something out of the box. It was a condom.  
  
"You've got to be kidding."  
  
"You want it?"  
  
"No thanks. I have some of those in my closet already."  
  
Jun's eyes widened. "Oh. Really?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Jun slowly nodded. His eyes were going back and forth to Nino and to the corner of the room.  
  
Nino coughed. "Anyway..." he said. "Since you're staying, you can sleep in my room upstairs tonight."  
  
"Okay," Jun said. "So, we're going to sleep together?"  
  
"No. I'll sleep on the sofa."  
  
"Oh, okay... You sure you don't mind?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Alright. Thank you." Jun walked up the stairs.  
  
Later that night, Nino was tossing and turning; he couldn't sleep. He thought that he should've foreseen this situation and bought softer pillows for his sofa. He was sure that he would get a neck strain after this. He closed his eyes shut, trying to force himself to sleep.  
  
All of a sudden, he heard footsteps from above, going down the staircase. Then they stopped. Thinking it was just his imagination, Nino ignored it. However, the lamp next to him was turned on, causing Nino to open his eyes.  
  
To his surprise, he found Jun standing in front of him. "I can't sleep," Jun said.  
  
"Okay," Nino sat up. "How may I help you then?" He asked.  
  
Jun climbed onto the sofa and goes to kiss him. Nino closes his eyes and starts to let loose, while his hands were caressing Jun's face. Jun's hands moved down to Nino's body, trying to reach a certain area. "Jun. Wait..." Nino said and got a hold of Jun's wrist. "Wait, stop. I can't let you do this."  
  
"But I want to," Jun said. Nino couldn't help but sigh. He lets go of Jun's wrist.  
Jun put his hand underneath Nino's sweatpants and takes his penis out. He then opens his mouth and starts sucking the tip.  
  
Nino never thought he would have such a view. Of Jun, that is. He could feel the warmness of his mouth wrapped around him. His breathing started to become heavy and slow.  
  
Jun then started to lick his whole length from bottom to top. His tongue tickled Nino. Nino covered his mouth as soft moans started to escape from it.  
  
"Ah!" Nino threw his head back and ejaculated. He opened up his eyes and found Jun wiping his messy face with his hands.  
  
"I'm sorry," Nino said.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because this time it wasn't only your _clothes_ that I messed up."  
  
Jun chuckled. "Does that still matter?"  
  
"To me, yes." Nino sighed. "What should I do?" He scratched his head. "It feels like I'm always the one who's receiving."  
  
Jun chuckled. "So, why not take the chance now?" The idol took the condom from earlier out of his pocket. Nino raised his eyebrows.  
  
Jun reclined on the sofa and places one of his legs on Nino's shoulder. Nino knew he had reached his limit. He couldn't resist anymore.  
Nino took Jun's thigh. "Alright," he said. "Let's take you then."  
  
***  
  
Nino found himself lying alone on his bed when he woke up. He was at a loss for a while, probably due to a lack of sleep. As he finally recalled the events from last night, he suddenly sat up.  
  
He managed to put a smile on his face. They had had sex. _Finally._ Nino felt light and was in high spirit, despite his still exhausted body.  
  
He went downstairs to the living room where he heard the sound of running water. The faucet squeaked as it was turned off. Jun came out of the bathroom wearing only his underwear and a towel wrapped around his head.  
  
"Oh, good morning," Jun said when he spotted Nino across the room.  
  
"Good morning," Nino said. He couldn't help but smile weirdly.  
Jun ran towards him and pecked a kiss on his lips. Nino jerked in response.  
  
"You slept well?" Jun asked.  
  
"I'm still quite in a daze." Nino rubbed his eyes. "Maybe we shouldn't have done another round."  
  
"You were the one who insisted on it."  
  
"Yeah, sorry."  
  
"Let me get dressed." Jun went up the stairs.  
  
It turned out that this day had started well, Nino thought. He was pretty much excited on what came next for them.  
  
All of a sudden, he heard the doorbell rang. "Just a moment," Nino yelled and ran to get the door. When he swung it open, he was blinded by flashes of light. He ducked and covered his face. As he opened his eyes, he found a crowd of photographers surrounding his house.  
Nino went back inside and closed the door. He gasped. This wasn't good; they knew. The paparazzi knew that Jun was here.  
  
"Hey, what's up?" Jun, who had just come back downstairs, asked. "You looked like you've seen a ghost."  
  
"Nothing." Nino shook his head. "Nothing's wrong."  
  
"Are you hiding something from me?"  
  
"No, I'm not."  
  
Jun walked past him and held the doorknob.  
  
"Jun, don't..." Nino pleaded but Jun opened the door. The cameras were aimed at the two of them. The sound of the camera shutters was overwhelming. They all shouted his name: _MatsuJun! Matsumoto Jun!_  
  
Jun slammed the door close. That moment, Jun didn't say a word nor did he make a sound.

Nino tried to approach him. "Jun, are you alright?"  
  
"You think I'm alright?" Jun turned and faced him. "They took pictures of us and you think I'm alright?" he shouted.  
  
"Hey, calm down. I'm sure we could fix this--"  
  
"Fix? Nino, this is something that can't be easily fixed. They're paparazzi! Of course this will spread not just in Japan but the whole world! Don't you get it?"  
  
Nino bowed down his head; his eyes fixated to the floor.  
  
Jun sighed. "Look, I came here because I know I would be safe here. Because I trusted you! But, boy, I was wrong. I should've just gone back home instead." He started to walk away.  
  
"Jun, please..." Nino got a hold of Jun's arm but Jun brushed him off.  
  
"Don't touch me!" Jun said and glared at him. Nino backed away. The idol went upstairs and later came back down wearing his coat and carrying his things.  
  
"Don't you dare try and contact me ever again." Jun said bitterly and walked out the door. The paparazzi crowded him and followed him as he ran away and escaped.  
  
Nino closed the door. And once again, he was alone. It was over. With nothing else to do, he dressed himself and got ready for work.  
  
"Good morning, boss," Toma greeted him. "How was your night?" he teased him, lifting his eyebrows.  
  
"Don't ask," Nino grumbled and proceeded to put his things on top of the counter. But he stopped as it hit him. He only knew one person who had a mouth big enough to tell the paparazzi where to find him and Jun.  
  
Nino turned and went to Toma. He grabbed his collar and pulled him closer. Toma became alarmed. "Woah! Boss, what's gotten into you?" he cried out.  
  
"You told them, didn't you?" Nino shouted.  
  
"W-What are you talking about?"  
  
"You were the only witness that night. No one else knew Jun was in my house except you."  
  
"Nino, please," Toma pleaded. "I swear, I didn't tell anyone, alright? Please dude, you have to believe me!"  
  
"Are you really sure? No one?"  
  
"Alright! I lied. He saw me! He asked if Jun was there and..."  
  
"He? Who's he?"  
  
Outside the window, a passerby caught Nino's eyes. It was one of the paparazzi.  
  
Nino let go of Toma and rushed out of the shop. He was about to confront the cameraman, but he found him approaching Ohno, who was in front of the diner. The man gave Ohno money and quickly left.  
  
Ohno carefully counts the bills. As he looked up where Nino was standing, his eyes widened.  
  
"So it was you," Nino said.  
  
Ohno kept a poker face and put the money into his pocket. "Yes." he said. "So what if was me?"  
  
Nino's face wrinkled. "How could you?" he exclaimed. "Have you even thought about Jun's feelings? My feelings?"  
  
"I thought about it long and hard. And this was my decision."  
  
"You're sick." He said with a spiteful tongue and began walked away.  
  
He then heard Ohno chuckle slightly. "Why? You think he's going to protect you and your relationship?"  
  
Nino came to a halt. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Remember that article, Nino?" Ohno said. "Well, guess what, that's exactly what's happening right now. Idols like him only care about their image: how they stand out in the crowd and how people see them. If his image gets ruined, it's over. He's going to deny you, just like everyone else he has dated in the past. And soon, you'll be replaced."  
  
Nino tightly clenched his hands.  
  
"I know this is difficult for you. But I'm doing this for your own good, Nino."  
  
Nino turned to face Ohno. "No," he said and shook his head. "Not anymore."  
  
***  
  
" _...please try again later._ "  
  
That night, Nino tried to contact Jun many times, despite having being told not to. But not even once did Jun even bother answering.  
  
He threw his phone at the wall in frustration, which caused the La Mariée poster hanging on the wall to fall down to the floor.  
  
Nino threw himself onto the sofa. While channel-hopping, he stumbled upon Jun's drama. For just a split-second, he saw _him_. Nino recognized himself in the background along with the other extras, even if he was blurry.  
  
At that moment, Nino thought that maybe he was just a background in Jun's life and nothing more.  
  
Nino turned off the TV and faced his own reflection in the now black screen.


	2. Chapter 2

Since then, everything had gone back to the way had been before, like they all hoped it would be. Work was once again Nino's priority. His _only_ priority. Books were sold and customers came in and went. He hoped that someone with a lowered cap, dark tinted shades, and a long coat would walk in one day. But seasons passed by in a flash, without him noticing. Not one person with such a description came in to the shop.  
  
And soon, before he knew it, it was spring again.  
  
It was another early morning at Sammy's. After their fight, Nino never went back to Sammy's during lunch since he would run into Ohno. Nino was sitting at one of the tables, mindlessly stirring his cup of coffee.  
  
Sho came to the table and slowly wiped it clean. "You alright?" Sho asked.  
  
"I want to eat spaghetti," Nino said, without looking him into the eyes.  
  
Sho sighed and sat down across him. "Have you seen the news lately?"  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Matsumoto Jun, of course."  
  
Nino abruptly stopped stirring.  
  
"He came out as gay," Sho said. "During their concert last December."  
  
Nino looked at him. "That's... wow." He then shook his head.  
  
"Yeah. That was really brave of him."  
  
Nino gave a nod and turned quiet again.  
  
Sho then leaned in and whispered to him. "This is just between you and me, alright?" He said and then took a deep breath. "Aiba and I had sex."  
  
Nino widened his eyes. "You what?" he exclaimed.  
  
"Yeah, I know you'd react that way."  
  
"How? And I thought you hated Aiba?"  
  
"I didn't hate him, you know." Sho said. "I was just afraid."  
  
Nino raised a brow. "Afraid? Why?"  
  
"I don't know. Like, am I alright with this person to just waltz into my life only to find that maybe, in the end, he would leave the same way? Well, so far, it's going well. But, I can't help thinking about such things."  
  
Nino nodded. "Yeah, I get you."  
  
"Then again, you won't know if you don't do anything. Because sometimes you have to be the one to make a move."  
  
Nino took a small sip from his coffee, then continued to drink it all. He put down his cup and had found the clock had struck seven.  
  
"Time to open." Sho stood up from his seat and went to turn their open/closed sign.  
  
Nino also stood up, getting ready to leave. As he reaches the door, Sho takes a hold of his shoulder. "Hey," Sho said and Nino looked at him. "Your relationship with Jun, I hope you'll get through it."  
  
Nino barely managed to smile. "I will."  
  
***  
  
"Thank you for coming!"  
  
Nino sat down on his chair and puts out his phone to play games. A habit that he had developed during the previous year. Sometimes he would play and not notice and greet the new customers coming in. Even the slacking and carefree Toma had scolded him at one point.  
  
As Nino was playing, he suddenly heard a familiar music being played in the shop. It was from the Arashi single Jun had given him.  
  
"Stop! Turn it off!" Nino kept shouting until the music finally stopped and was changed by Toma.  
  
"I told you to delete that song from your damn laptop!" Nino told Toma. "Geez!"  
  
"I'm sorry." he said.  
  
Nino clicked his tongue and went back to his game. However, Toma grabbed his phone from him. "Hey!" Nino exclaimed. "I was almost..."  
  
"I hate to break it to you, Nino," Toma said. "But, honestly, I'm tired. Alright? It's just that you're not yourself these days; you don't even smile anymore. Not even once after you guys broke up."  
  
Nino looked away from him.  
  
Toma sighed. "They're having a movie shooting around here today. I saw it on the internet. It's not far from here."  
  
"And you're telling me this because?"  
  
"I want you to at least try to talk to him."  
  
Nino then remembered Sho's words from yesterday. _Make a move._ He hadn't done anything else to reconnect with Jun after trying to call him. A year had passed already; he knew he shouldn't be stuck like this. "You know what?" Nino stood up. "You're right. I should talk to him... No, I _will_ talk to him."  
  
Toma grinned. "That's the spirit, boss."  
  
Nino found the filming location at the nearby high school, just as Toma had told him. Immediately, Nino saw the staff and cameramen on the site. As he came nearer, he finally sees Jun in the middle. The curls of his hair were gone; it was straightened and cut short. He also had gotten bangs that almost reached his eyebrows.  
  
"Cut!" The director shouted. Jun and the other actors then scattered and went to their assigned seats to sit down. Nino tried to approach Jun but was blocked by security. The guard asked him if he had a pass.  
  
"No I don't have one, sir." he replied. "It won't take long; I just want to talk to Matsumoto Jun."  
  
"I'm sorry but we cannot allow you to enter without a pass," the guard said and then told him to leave.  
  
"Let him in," Jun said as he came to them. "He's my friend."  
  
The guard let Nino go.  
  
"It's been a while," Jun tells him. "What brings you here?"  
  
"I... happened to pass by. I was just having my daily walk."  
  
"Is that so?" Jun chuckled. "What a coincidence."  
  
"Actors! Stand by!" The director yelled.  
  
"Why don't you stay here and watch for a bit?" Jun said. "I'll get back to you soon afterwards."  
  
"Sure."  
  
"If you want, feel free to look around," Jun then went off.  
  
Nino looked around the set and stumbled upon the sound booth. He went inside and found a headphone. Nino put them on and, to his surprise, he heard Jun's voice.  
  
"What?" Jun said rather irritated.  
  
He then heard the other actor whispering. "Who's the guy you let in earlier?"  
  
"No one special," Jun replied.  
  
"Is it him? The one in the articles?"  
  
"You're mistaken. He's just an acquaintance."  
  
"Why are you getting so worked up then? Tell me."  
  
"I told you alright. He's just an acquaintance; there's nothing going on between us."  
Nino removed the headphones from his ears and put them back. He no longer wanted to listen further into their conversation. He had already heard what he had wanted to hear.  
He sneaked out and left the area, and walked back to the bookshop.  
  
***  
  
The new arrivals had come at last. Nino carried the boxes one by one into the shop by himself. Toma was busy taking care of his mother, probably roaming around the mall and doing window shopping as always.  
  
Nino remembered the look of disappointment on Toma's face when he had come back from the filming location. Toma had called him a coward, and he was probably right. The real reason why Nino didn't want to be in a relationship anymore was that he was scared; scared that the next relationship would just end like the last.  
  
As he was about to go back out to get the last box, he saw Jun standing at the front. He wasn't wearing a coat, not even a hat or shades to conceal his identity. He was dressed in a white long-sleeved sweater and plain blue jeans. He appeared to be carrying a flat, square object covered in gift wrap.  
  
"Need help?" Jun asked him.  
  
Nino ignored him and passed by. "How rude." Jun remarked. "Is that how you treat your customers nowadays?"  
  
"Look who's talking," Nino said and carried the box into the shop.  
  
Jun then followed him inside. "I don't know why you left the other day. But, please, let's talk, Nino," he said. "Please..."  
  
Nino put the box on top of the counter. "Fine. Go ahead."  
  
"I want to apologize for everything." Jun began. "I'm sorry that I hurt you; it just happened again. I wasn't really thinking straight that time." He handed over the object he was holding to Nino. "Think of it as my apology gift."  
  
Nino took the gift and placed it against one of the bookshelves. "I appreciate that." he said.  
  
"I came here thinking that maybe... we should give ourselves a second chance."

Nino looked up at him.  
  
"What do you say to that?"  
  
Nino gave a smirk. "What do I say?" He briefly chuckled and shook his head. "I can't. I'm sorry, Jun. It's just that... I don't think I can put up with you."  
  
Jun's expression got darker.  
  
"You're an idol; you're in TV shows, on billboards, in magazines. Almost everyone in Japan knows who you are. I mean, think about it. You ending up with a bookshop owner? And moreover, a man? Anyone, not just your fans, would be in disbelief... I think it's better if we go our separate ways."  
  
Jun slowly nodded. "Okay." he said and took a deep breath. "I understand." Then he chuckled. "It's kind of funny when people treat us like we're so important. So... _great;_ just because we're idols. The media just shows you what they want to show you. They want to show you that: this is Matsumoto Jun. But that's not me..." He bit his lip. "For once, I thought of what I wanted for myself. Because, in the end, idols like me are nothing special; we're no different from everyone else. We're also selfish and lonely humans. I'm just another guy who wants someone to love him as much as he can."  
  
Nino frowned. Jun went to him and gave him a hug. As he let go, Jun turned away. Nino could hear the idol sniffing.  
  
"Goodbye, Kazunari," he said without facing him and left the shop.  
  
***  
  
"So, what do you guys think?" Nino asked. He had gone to Sammy's and had told Ohno, Sho, and Aiba about what happened earlier at the bookshop. Ohno was sitting straight and with his chin up. Sho was leaning in while he listening to Nino and his hands were clasped together. Meanwhile, Aiba had his head face down and was pouting.  
  
"It was a good decision," Sho remarked. "No one wants toxic relationships." Ohno and Aiba nodded.  
  
"Great," Nino said. "That's great."  
  
Suddenly, Toma walked into the diner all sweaty and his hair a mess like the wind had harshly blown through it. "Sorry, I had some business with my mother back at my apartment," he said. "What's going on?"  
  
"Nino rejected Jun," Sho told him.  
  
Toma turned to Nino. "How could you!" he said.  
  
"No, Toma. Nino has his reasons."  
  
"Well, Nino, I'm glad you've finally come back to your senses," Ohno said.  
  
"I disagree." Aiba remarked. Sho and Ohno both turned to glare at him.  
  
"I mean, who would decline such an offer, right?" Aiba defended. "Also, the time he spent just to see you. Not all idols have the time to do stuff like that... Well, that's what I think."  
  
"He is an idol." Nino said. "But... he told me that idols are no different from everyone. And that he was just another guy who wants someone to love him."  
  
They all then looked down and twisted their mouths, as if they were mourning.  
  
"Well, so what?" Ohno burst out, as if pushing away the guilty expression he had earlier. "What did he give to you anyway?"  
  
Nino looked to his side, where he had placed Jun's gift. "Let's take a look then." He placed the gift on top of the table.  
  
He starts to carefully remove the tape. He unfolded the gift wrap and on the top corners appeared what seemed to be a canvas covered with shades of blue paint. He continues to remove the gift wrap and finds a painting that Nino knew all too well.  
  
The painting on the poster.  
  
" _La Mariée_ ," Ohno uttered and proceeded to touch the edges of the canvas. "Wait. Don't tell me; is this the real thing?" He then looked up at Nino, who was in shock.  
  
"Oh God." Nino shuts his eyes and bowed his head. "I'm so stupid; I've made the wrong decision, haven't I?"  
  
"Yup," Toma replied.  
  
"Now, I've really done it," Nino said. "I've lost him and I let him go. It's over."  
  
"What do you mean it's over?" Aiba said. "It's not over yet. Sho rejected me many times but it didn't stop me. And neither should it stop you. If you want the man, you have to be a man!" he said and raised a clenched fist.  
  
Nino sighed. "Even if I want to, I can't. I have no idea where he is."  
  
"Wait a minute," Toma said and pulled out his phone. He seemed to be searching something. "I remember; they're having a press conference today!"  
  
"A press conference about what?"  
  
"Jun leaving Arashi."  
  
"He's leaving?" Nino exclaimed.  
  
"Oh no, it started just a few minutes ago." Toma said. "And it's gonna end in an hour."  
  
"But how can we get there in time?"  
  
"I have a car," Aiba said.  
  
"How fast can you go?" Nino asked.  
  
"As fast as late night driving," Aiba winked. With Sho hitting him on the back of his head, it was clear that Aiba meant a different kind of driving.  
  
All five of them rushed to Aiba's car, with Sho having the front seat and the other three stuck in the back.  
  
"Hold on tight, guys." Aiba fastened his seatbelt. His foot pushed the pedal and the car went on full speed. The four, who were off guard, had their backs pushed against their seats.  
  
"Slow down, you idiot!" Sho screamed.  
  
Aiba came to a halt as he saw the traffic ahead. He then made a sharp turn back.  
  
"Are you out of your mind?" Sho hit Aiba on his shoulder. "You can't make a u-turn here; this is only a one-way road!"  
  
"This is an emergency. For the moment, we're outlaws."  
  
"That doesn't make any sense... Ahhh!" Sho pointed at the front where a car was approaching them. Aiba quickly turned to the right at the intersection, avoiding a collision. Aiba stopped and parked the car next to the sidewalk.  
  
Aiba gasped. "I think it's better if we run," he said.  
  
"I agree," Toma said.  
  
Nino got out of the car and sprinted off. The rest of them followed. They reached the building just in time, with only 15 minutes left before the press conference ends. "Excuse me," Nino said as he approached the front desk. "I'm here for the press conference."  
  
"Do you have a pass?"  
  
Nino shook his head. "No; it's an emergency..."  
  
"I'm sorry; but you cannot enter without a pass."  
  
"Dammit!" Nino slammed his fist onto the front desk.  
  
"Excuse me, sir." A familiar voice could be heard next to them. "These people are with me."  
  
Nino looked to where the man stood. "Mr. Tosaki," he said with a smile. "Thank you."  
  
"No need to thank me," He said.  
  
Nino gave him a nod and along with the four, he ran towards the door. Lots of journalists and reporters filled the room, along with rows of cameras from different networks. At the front were the five Arashi members, with Jun sitting in the very middle.  
  
"Matsumoto." One of the reporters called Jun. "You've announced that you will be leaving Arashi. Does this have anything to do with your coming out last December?"  
  
"No. I'm simply leaving for personal reasons."  
  
"And when will you be leaving?"  
  
"Next week; as soon as possible."  
  
"Alright. Are there any more questions you'd would like to ask?" Arashi's press agent asked.

One of them raised their hand and stood up. "Last year, there were some graphic photos of you staying over in a house with a man. May I ask about your relatonship?"  
  
"We're just friends. I think."  
  
The press agent gave nod. "Any final questions before we wrap up?"  
  
Nino raised his hand.  
  
"Yes." The man pointed at him. "Over there at the back."  
  
All attention was then directed at him. He saw Jun look to where he was; the idol's eyes widened as soon as he saw him. A lady approached Nino and gave him a microphone. "Hello." Nino spoke into the microphone. "I have a question for Matsumoto Jun. Uh, I was wondering if you and that man were, possibly, more than just friends..."  
  
"I did thought that we were close but..." Jun then shook his head. "No."  
  
"But, wait, you said--"  
  
"I'm sorry." The press agent said. "Only _one_ final question."  
  
"No, it's alright," Jun told him. He then turned back to Nino. "Go on."  
  
"You said that making people happy is something you, and also the rest of the members, love; that it was the only thing that mattered. You didn't want anyone's efforts to go to waste. But, what about yours? Didn't they matter?"  
  
Jun briefly squinted his eyes. "I've always thought that others should come first." He said. "So, I am quite used to it."  
  
"But what about the other members? Don't they think the same?"  
  
The five idols then looked at each other. The leader took hold of his microphone. "I'm sorry, but we have no comment on that," He said.  
  
Nino couldn't understand it. Why can't these idols stand up for themselves? "Why can't you stay?" Nino asked.  
  
"I wanted to... But it was the agency's decision."  
  
Jun's words from before resonated in his head: _they all made the decisions; they didn't even ask for my opinion..._ Nino realized that they were all controlled. Even if they wanted to refuse and speak up, they couldn't do it.  
  
Jun and the other members; they were all afraid too.  
  
"If that man from the article--" Nino began to speak but someone interrupted him.  
  
"Oh, his name's Ninomiya," One of the journalists told him.  
  
"Uh, right..." Nino cleared his throat. "If... Mr. Ninomiya came to you; begging for forgiveness, realizing what a jerk he was, and told you that he will wholeheartedly accept you and support you in everything you do... Would you be willing to reconsider?"  
  
The whole room had turned silent as they awaited Jun's answer. Nino, Toma, Sho, and Aiba waited anxiously, with Ohno actually praying. The Arashi members too looked at Jun with worry.  
  
"We'll see." Jun said at last.  
  
Nino finally felt relieved as he heard Jun's answer. Ohno even wrapped his arm around him and smiled, the regret and acceptance reflected in his teary eyes.  
  
Nino found Jun whispering something to the press agent. "Alright." he said. "Uh, Ogura. You may ask your question again."  
  
"Matsumoto, how much longer will you be staying in Arashi?"  
  
Jun looked at Nino with a meaningful gaze and slowly a smile appeared on the idol's face. It was the same smile he had worn the first time they had met.  
  
***  
  
"Indefinitely, huh?"  
  
"It was the only thing I could think of saying. But, hey, it got trending on twitter."  
  
"I don't have a twitter account though. Also, I thought Johnny's weren't supposed to have social media accounts?"  
  
"It's not like they'll find out anyway." The idol then winked. "Oh, other than that, _hashtag mysterious good-looking interviewer_ also went trending."  
  
"Oh God."  
  
"Hey, at least it's better than being in a tabloid article."  
  
"Well, yeah... Definitely."  
  
"..."  
  
"What? Stop looking at me like that."  
  
"You nervous?"  
  
"Of course! Aren't you?"  
  
"Just a bit. But you'll get used to it, Nino."  
  
Nino looked outside through the car window. "Gosh, there's too many people outside." He groaned. However, he felt Jun's hand over his and soon his anxiety had faded away.  
  
At last, the car stopped.  
  
"Are you ready?" Jun said, still holding Nino's hand tightly.  
  
Nino took a deep breath and grabbed the door handle. "Ready."


End file.
